"So the Word became human and lived here on earth among us. He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the glory of the only Son of the Father." - John 1:14

Over the past couple of years, one of the things that God has really been growing me in, is my understanding and practice of "interdependence." He has been teaching me that I can't... and am not intended to, do life on my own.

To some, this is an easy truth. To me, it's not. I fight against the strong desire to be independent and show my independence. "I can fiix this...," "I can handle this...," "I'll take care of that..." "No, I don't need help. I can do it.."

On this missionary journey, I feel like I'm being stretched in this area to the utmost degree.

As I think about living in a new culture and community, I know that I'll need to look to others to help me navigate all the cultural nuances and learn the language.

My finances are provided through a network of people and churches who are joining with me in ministry. To live where God has called me and to do the work He's called me to do... I need people to partner with me to do it.

There are things that I've never encountered before and have no idea what I'm supposed to do -- how do I file taxes as a missionary? how do I pack up my "life" to live somewhere else for two years? how do I "talk" on skype? how do I ship a balikbayan box?

So, last night I was looking through a list of people that God has brought into my life. I am humbled. I am grateful. I am awed.

Humbled ... Quite literally I could NOT be doing this work without these people. I NEED them. That people would choose to give sacrificially is hard to understand at times. And I'm not just talking money -- giving time, sharing ideas... so much!

Grateful ... In some ways I feel like I don't feel it enough. I know I don't express it enough. But, I am grateful. On this list are... People who have given me a places to live at different times. People who have fed me. People who have clothed me. People who have prayed for me -- some daily!! People who have been an advocate for me. People who have given financially to the ministry. People who have encouraged me. People who have counseled me. People who have kicked me in the butt to get me moving. People who have pointed things out to me and opened my eyes to different realities and truths. People who have held my hand... and just sat with me. People who have done life with me... and have taught me how to do life iwith them.

Awed ... I am in awe when I look at this list. Some people on this list I have known for a lifetime (literally!) Some people I have known since high school. Some people I've known since college. Some people I've worked with. Some people I've just met in this last year. And some people I've not even had the chance to meet yet! God ties us together in such amazing and unique ways. I am awed at God's power and at His heart to do this. He doesn't want me to do life alone, but to learn absolute dependence on Him... and to be connected to those around me. I am amazed. At His heart... and His heart in others.

The list is a huge expression to me of God's love, care and provision in my life -- His heart for me...and for the nations.

Blest be the tie that binds...

I really do have so much fun when I get to share about the ministry of Bible translation with others. It's such a neat thing to be able to tell stories from around the world. I love seeing and listening to the various reactions people have after hearing about the need people still have for the Bible in their language.

This past weekend I went to Frackville, PA where I got to share the message during their worship service and also give the children's moment. It was so neat to have the chance to share about the ministry with the church there.

AND... it was such an encouraging time for me as well! Before the service even started the people in the church were so welcoming. And following the service I was so encouraged and affirmed by so many.

Sometimes ... during this time of waiting and waiting and waiting ... there are moments when I wonder -- maybe I'm not supposed to go overseas. But I am reminded over and over again that this is where God has led me. And He reminds me, encourages me and gives me confirmation in this decision in so many ways.

God has shown me the ways that He uses His Word to change me, my heart, my life. He has shown me the need people have all around the world to have His Word in a language that speaks to their heart. And... He has shown me the ways that I can be a part of seeing that need met.

God is so gracious -- giving so much, letting me be a part of what He's doing around the world, being so patient and faithful when I am weak in believing, and reminding me over and over again of the things I forget.

I got a card today from a sweet couple I met in Frackville. They encouraged me on Sunday. They encouraged me today. And knowing that they are praying daily for me... will certainly encourage me in days to come.

God is good.

It's been flurrying a bit this past week. I've loved seeing little white flakes falling from the sky. It's so beautiful looking out the window and seeing white on the tips of the tree branches.

I've mostly been enjoying it from inside. I've been sick. In bed. Popping vitamin C. Eating lots of oranges. Trying to get better. I'm not 100% yet.

Would you pray I'd be well tomorrow?
I'm to share about my ministry at a church in Frackville, PA on SUNDAY. I'd like to be physically and mentally ready and excited to share with that church.

One of the things I really do enjoy is the opportunity to share about Bible translation with friends, family, and churches.

This month I have some incredible opportunities to share with others about Bible translation and the work I'll be doing. I am excited to be able to open people's eyes - perhaps for the first time - to the need people still have for God's Word in their heart language.

Would you pray with me for my preparation for these opportunities AND for God's message to be communicated, received and applied for those who hear it? Would you pray that I would seek God's wisdom and heart as I prepare what I will share? Pray that I would remember that God is with me and have His peace, His confidence and His words in each situation.

December 9
Frackville United Methodist Church
• Sunday service message, children's message and youth Sunday school

December 13
CMA Luncheon (I'm attending this -- yay!! and while it's not my primary reason for going, there might be good opportunities to share about the ministry of Bible translation with other attendees).

December 15
Men's Prayer Breakfast (gathering of praying men from churches throughout Bucks County area)
• Sharing an update / message with these men who have been faithful prayer partners.

December 30
Langhorne United Methodist Church
• Sunday Contemporary Service - sharing the message
• 8 am Traditional Service - sharing a brief message
• 10:30 am Traditional Service - sharing a brief message

As these opportunities come in the midst of this busy holiday season, pray that I would be diligent in preparing and serve well these churches.

Pray as well that as I continue to seek ministry partners and opportunities to create awareness for Bible translation, pray that more opportunities might come up for this, and next month.

Often during these times I feel so inadequate to do this job. It's good to remember that it is God who calls, prepares, equips and provides...

Thank you for your prayers, friends...

I have a Facebook account.

I can spend a lot of time on Facebook. Especially when I'm procrastinating.

I was checking out some of the applications that you can connect to online. I found this scrapblog application. The neat thing is... I can share scrapblogs on different websites -- Facebook, MySpacce, Xanga and right here on Blogspot.

But, it doesn't quite look like it's working. No fun!

If you happen to see the scrapblog, these are photos from my cousin's wedding last November.

Now... back to work for me. :)

(PBS is showing the Les Mis anniversary concert. It's great working with Les Mis in the background. I love it!)

The movie Amazing Grace came out on DVD this past week.

I watched it this past weekend... AGAIN.

I really love this movie.

I think what I love about the movie is that it is a powerful story of a man who chooses to live his life in a way that honors God and makes a difference in the world. And... he makes that choice over and over again.

He gets tired - physically and emotionally -- of trying to move forward with making change in the world. He has to choose AGAIN how he will invest his life. He has friends around him to help make that choice -- reminding him of the passion within him, the gifts he's been given, and the change in the world that's needed to be made.

I hope that I too live my life in a similar way -- eyes open to the world and people around me, my heart passionate for God, surrounded by wise, Godly friends, and choosing consistently the ways of God.

even at the "City Garage."

I'm sitting in the auto shop waiting for my cousin to pick me up -- thanks, cousin for this last minute pick up!! The wait is actually okay because this place has Wi-Fi!!!

I'm impressed. I used to bring my car to get fixed or get an oil change and at one point I used to WAIT until they were done. I remember one day I spent LITERALLY the whole day in the shop's waiting room. I read. I watched tv. I people-watched. I slept. I talked on the phone. But, I have never waited in a car shop's waiting room and gotten online.

Wi-Fi is everywhere these days.... hotels... fast-food places... even the auto shop.

Technology amazes me! The fact that I can send an email to my colleagues in Manila and get a response in what seems like seconds is incredible! AMAZING!!!

I've met people here in Dallas who have provided input to translation teams clear on the other side of the world over the Internet.

It's sooo cool to me that people could be doing work related to Bible translation on a computer while waiting in an auto shop in Coppell, TX ... or in a house in the mountains of Peru ... or in an office building in Manila, Philippines ...

a lot can change.

A little over a year ago (September 2006) I was in Orlando going through 2 weeks of training and orientation to the organization. Along with about 40 other trainees, I was a part of "Training Camp #29" (TC 29).

This past weekend 7 of us who are in the Dallas area got together for a little TC 29 Reunion.

A lot can happen in a year. Sitting in the room and catching up with these friends reminded me of that. We didn't even get to talk about ALL the things that have gone on in our lives in the past year, but even with just bits and pieces you realize so much can take place in just a year...

• one woman is now teaching ESL to international students at the local university
• two guys are preparing to complete schooling to do language work
• two of the people in our group met (at TC), got engaged, got married and are now settled into a new home and new jobs
• one couple is expecting the birth of their first child

When I think about going "away" for a year I sometimes find that I do get sad and even jealous.

Things are going to happen in the lives of my friends and family ... and I won't be "here" (wherever "here" is :) ) to experience it like everyone else. In a way it sometimes seems like deep down inside I'm shocked that people's lives would go on without me around to be witness to it! (HAHAHAH!!! -- pathetic, I know.) I'm sad that I won't get be with friends as they move into their new houses, have babies, get married, celebrate birthdays, go through hard times... and all the little day-to-day stuff that happens that brings color into our lives.

BUT... I'm thankful for things like cell phones, web cams, Facebook, Skype, and all the things that help to make the miles seem less far apart.

I'm realizing that my time in Dallas is quickly running out. The other night I was having a hard time going to sleep wondering ... "How productive have I been during my time here?"

How do I "measure" my productivity when my basic goals for this time in Dallas included getting more orientation to the world of Bible translation, going through some training, spending time with family and building relationships?

I'm a task-oriented person. I like checking off boxes on my to-do list. I'm going to leave Dallas with a few identifiable "tasks" completed... but, I do know that my time here has been so rich with experiences and I've been incredibly blessed through people.

I guess I'm learning new ways of defining "productivity" or "success" and learning that sometimes the most valuable things really are "immeasurable."

The past couple of days have helped me recognize this.

During my time here I've met with different people who are involved in various aspects in the work of helping others have access to God's Word in their heart language. It's been amazing seeing all the ways that people are involved in this! And, I've been absolutely inspired seeing the passion people have for God, His Word and for the people they've had the opportunity to work alongside.

Yesterday I met with someone and we talked about the ways that STORIES are used in helping people learn the truths of God's Word. Today I met with another colleague and we talked about the ways that language communities are learning how to USE the translated Scriptures in their personal lives, families, churches and communities.

How do I measure the value of time spent with people like this? It has been a great privilege to meet with so many here in Dallas who have had part in work all around the world. It's been great for me to learn from them.

And... I just love hearing the ways God allows us to take part in this work! I love meeting people who are excited about the things they get to do. It energizes me. It reminds me of how grateful I am to participate also.

So... my time in Dallas... immeasurably rich :)

3 years ago today, my nephew was born!

Happy Birthday, Xander!!!

I have to keep reminding myself of that.

I am at times sooo eager to be in the Philippines and to be doing the job that waits for me there. At times I think I'm a little too eager.

The last few nights I have had a hard time falling asleep. It's likely because of busy days and caffeine. During my sleepless hours I've been thinking a lot about what it's going to be like.

• What will my apartment be like?
• Where will I go to church?
• Will I be able to make some good friends there?
• Will I ever be able to understand and speak Tagalog when I'm over there?
• How long will it be before I see my stateside family?
• How will I handle traveling through the city?
• Will I go through culture shock?
• How bad will it be???
• Will I enjoy my job?
• Will I really be successful in my new role?
• Will I like living in the Philippines?

I wonder what life in Manila will be like and start to feel like... "God, can't I just be there living these questions out already??!!"

And then I have to remind myself that I have to "rest in the sovereignty of God." I heard that phrase last week from one of Wycliffe International's leaders and it seemed to reflect well my current desire. I want to rest in His sovereignty.

There are things that God is doing right now, right where I am today ... to prepare me for what's next. He's allowing me to have time to spend with family. He's providing opportunities for me to share about this ministry. He's developing a strong team to partner with me in ministry. He's giving me this time during which I could be soaking in His Word and be in prayer (oh, that I really would take advantage of this time in this regard!)

I need to recognize that this season in my life is a gift. In so many ways it is a time of true preparation for what's next. And I'm learning that this time isn't just about being a stepping stone. This time in itself is valuable. This time in itself is a time to draw closer to God and hopefully look more like Jesus.

I need to not be toooo anxious and eager for what's next that I miss out on what I can be experiencing and learning now.

I AM excited about being in Manila. Just learning to wait with patience and filled with contentment and joy for the present.

This past May I had the opportunity to visit my future work place. In Ortigas Center in Pasig City, Philippines -- a desk awaits my arrival.

when I get to tell people about Bible translation.

During yesterday's worship service at some of family's church here in Dallas, I had the opportunity to share about the work of Bible translation. I really do love when I get to do this!

Ok, I'm not always excited about it during the days leading up to it. As a matter of fact, I dread it. I prepare, prepare, prepare and worry, worry, worry. But...

I love when I get to share about this ministry.
I love when I see and hear the responses of people hearing about this work for the first time.
I love knowing that I get to be a part of others learning about the need of thousands of language communities around the world who are still waiting for God's Word in their language.

I really enjoyed sharing at the church yesterday. It was so encouraging speaking with some of the people afterwards!! My prayer is that whenever I have the chance to share with a group of people, that God would use whatever I say (no matter how mumbly or incoherent it may be!!) to His glory in their lives. So... praying that.

It was a blessing to me to have had the opportunity to share in the service and also to spend time with their youth Sunday School for the last couple of weeks. I've been in "training mode" for most of the last couple of months and it can sometimes feel a bit tiring. Sharing what God has been doing in my life and around the world was sooo energizing for me -- a reminder to me of why I'm doing all of this.

I hope that I have more opportunities to share with churches before I leave the country.

AND... I hope that I never tire... never lose the excitement to share about the ways God is working around the world and to share His heart for people to have His Word in their heart language.

FALL.

Today in Dallas it was a beautiful day.
The sun was shining, there was a nice cool breeze.
It was cool enough that driving home I finally opened up the sun roof and "rolled" down the windows while I listened to some old Dave Matthews Band.
It FELT like fall.

I missed the four seasons when I moved to Florida. In Florida it felt like there was the HOT season and the not-as-hot season. Perhaps living in Florida was good preparation for life in Manila.

Don't get me wrong... there are a lot of things I'm looking forward to experiencing in Manila, but it doesn't mean that there won't be things I'll miss when I leave.

Fall will just be one of the many... :)

Two big disappointments from this weekend.
1. David Crowder Band is on tour and is at the House of Blues here in Dallas tonight. I am not.
2. My cousin's little girl's birthday party is this weekend. My brother, sister-in-law and nephew will be there (as well as my cousins and aunt from Dallas!)... I will not.

Oh well. Can't be everywhere all the time, right? :)

Things I've enjoyed being while in Dallas...

1 - the beautiful flowers on the sides of the road - which I've been told is the legacy left by Lady Bird Johnson (I feel very ignorant about TX history here)









2 - spending time with my cousins here! I get to live with my cousin, Lani and her husband, Jeff which is really great for me. AND, I got to spend time with some more of my TX cousins almost all weekend last weekend. Including going to my one cousin's school fundraiser and going to the Texas State Fair!!

Rachel and the big prize Fred won her.

Eric and Fred -- and the crazy ride they rode!

Eric rode this one -- he's the brave one.









3 - State Fair Food! The "state fair food" really is a category on its own.
Jeff and Lani taking a bite out of the apple (a candied one...)








We tried "Deep fried Oreos." Oh yummy!








...and "Deep fried Banana Pudding"








...and "Texas-styled Nachos"!








And, it wouldn't be a fair without Cotton Candy!!








4 - the Cowboys game last weekend! It was soo much fun!









My wonderful hosts while I'm in Texas!

5 - Sprinkles Cupcakes! My cousin, Rachel and her boyfriend, Fred, bought cupcakes from Sprinkles for us. Yummy! We need to go and try the Red Velvet ones.

6 -Having a Panera nearby. Coming to you from... Panera :)

is amazing.

Yesterday, right after I posted, I went to a staff meeting at the office. One of the women shared a devotional written by Jill Carattini, "Boxes and Prophets." She talks about our tendencies to "put God in a box" without even knowing it. She says, "God is in a box and remains therein until the lines are challenged." So, where are lines needing to be challenged in my life? Where am I limiting the absolute GREATNESS of God to do what HE can do?

Oh.. I do that in so many ways!
"There's no way I'm going to Manila in January..." "I will be single forever..." "How will my friend ever come to really know Jesus..."
Boxes, boxes, everywhere!

So, I was reminded shortly after I wrote yesterday's post that GOD IS GOD. Know that.

THEN... when my cousin (in-law) came home he brought up the mail and had in his hand a package... FOR ME!!! Wouldn't it be like God that on a day of discouragement, He would have a care-package from a sweet friend arrive from Orlando!

The box was full of fun things that make my friend happy. And it so it made me happy!

Among the tons of stuff in the box... a pack of markers, a BIG bag of DARK CHOCOLATE, PEANUT M&Ms and a journal with this quote...

"Anna came to the ball prepared. She was beautiful in a striking gown that shimmered like starlight. She spent hours getting herself ready -- her hair, her dress, her heart. As they reached the dance floor, Anna expresses her fear of dancing with the King before the eyes of others. 'We wouldn't want to end up in a heap.' she says. His answer to her questioning heart? 'I am King. I will lead.'

"Jesus is extending his hand to you. He is inviting you to dance with Him. He asks, 'May I have this dance...every day of your life?' His gaze is fixed on you. He is captivated by your beauty. He is smiling. He cares nothing of the opinion of others. He is standing. He will lead. He waits for your response."

"My lover spoke and said to me, Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me." Song of Solomon 2:10

Oh, how I want to dance! My gaze fixed on Him. Captivated by His beauty. Smiling. Caring nothing of the opinion of others. Following His lead. Responding to Him.

Dance, Dance, Dance!

I need more patience.
I need more trust.

I'm hoping to be able to leave for the Philippines sometime in January 2008.
In order to do that I have to have pretty much 100% of the financial commitments to cover my monthly expenses. ... and to have seen those commitments come in consistently for a couple of months (you know, to make sure that they're really commitments).

It's now October and God has provided 64% of my monthly financial needs in commitments from churches and ministry partners. It's been exciting and in so many ways, UNEXPECTED, the ways that God has provided!

Some days I'm incredibly excited and encouraged. Other days I think... when's it going to happen. Will I really get to go in January? If not in January, when will it be?

Today, I'm feeling all of it. Encouraged because I know God is the one who has provided through all these amazing people. But also just wondering how long it will actually take me. AND... will I really be okay if I have to WAIT?

I'm not always good at waiting.

I've been down in Dallas for a couple of weeks now. I can't believe how quickly my time here is going!! I've not had ready access to the Internet, so sorry for not blogging more frequently.

Last week I participated in a training session "Learning that LASTS." Basically we learned about, and practiced, "learner-centered" training. It was a challenging week for me. I had a really hard time engaging with the material and with the class in general. I think I was mostly having a hard time dealing with having to switch gears yet again from one training course to another... adjusting from one set of people to another set of people.

The principles that were taught really are useful AND I feel like I'll be challenged to apply the principles in the different opportunities I'll have now and in the future in training others. I'm glad I went. We had to pair up with other participants and actually apply the principles in practice teaching sessions. I was able to work with two women who work in "Communications" here in Dallas. It was good to work with them -- and to see that it was possible and helpful to use the principles, tips and tools in planning training sessions.

The training was only one week long so now I'm "free" to take care of other things while I'm in Dallas... like...

1- spending time with folks who do communications work here in Dallas on an international level
2 - spending time with family (I have a lot of cousins, aunts and uncles in the area)
3 - visiting with churches in this area (I got to share with the youth Sunday school last week and will have the chance to teach Sunday school for 2 weeks in October. I will also get to share about Bible translation with the whole church at my aunts and uncles' church here in Dallas the 2nd weekend in October.)
4 - meeting up with friends who live in Texas (friends who I attended training with last year, friends from college... )

My drive to the office usually takes about 40-45 minutes. Today, it took 2 hours. There were 3 BAD accidents that I saw today. If you're ever wondering what you can be praying about for me... pray for God's grace and patience as I travel around Dallas.

More later...

SIGH.
It's been a while since my last blog :)

I'm now in Dallas... arrived here on early Wednesday morning (a little bit past midnight).

A lot has happened since my last blog and today. I'll take some time over the next week or so to catch up with some "post"blogging. :)

Right now I'm in the hospital with my aunt who is recovering from her heart surgery on Monday. She'll go home tomorrow which I'm sure she's excited about.

I'm glad to be here in Dallas. I have a lot of family here in town and it will be nice to spend time with them.

Why am I in Dallas?
Wycliffe International has their office here in Dallas and I'll be spending time with some of the Communications folks here to pick their brains before I head overseas. I'm also going to go through some formal training. The training I'm going to be taking next week is called "Learning that LASTS". Basically training on how to train others effectively. I'll learn principles of adult learning and how to apply those principles in developing effective training. This will be helpful to me when I'm working in Asia as a Communications Consultant.

Spending time in Dallas will also hopefully give me the opportunity to spend good, quality time with my family in this area (I have a lot of aunts, uncles and cousins here!). I'm also hoping to really work on continuing to develop my ministry team over the two months I'm here in Texas.

Ok... more later...
:)

North Carolina.
Really.
I know, I was complaining when I first got here, but it's really grown on me.

I love the way it's quiet out here.
I love that it gets dark and you can actually see the stars.
I love that there's real grass on the ground (you Floridians know what I mean...).
I love that there are hills and mountains.
I love the butterflies that fly around all over the place.
I love this little town and the cute little coffeeshop where all the locals hang out.
I love the friendly community feeling here.
I love that people have houses that look different from the other ones on their street.
I love that people actually have yards - room to run and play.

Tonight Heather, Jeff and I went over to a co-worker's house and sat out on the back patio. It was BEAUTIFUL out there. We saw deer come out of the wood to feed by the pond. I heard a hummingbird for the first time as it flew by the screened porch. I watched dove, cardinals and other pretty birds fly through the yard and eat from the feeder. I saw a spider make a web over the fire pit. I saw the stars come out as the night got darker. And I saw a lightning bug.

Wow... I sound like I've been nature deprived :)

Ok, yes. There was ICC class today. Day number... who knows??!! There are only 3 days left (including Friday which is our "graduation" day).

But, today was all about water...
WHITEWATER.
Wooooooooooooooooooo-hooooooooooooooooo!!!!

A group of us left for Charlotte right after marriage seminar class (yes, I stuck with it all four weeks!!). We were off for our whitewater rafting adventure at the U.S. National Whitewater Center. It was AWESOME!!!! It was sooo much fun!

I didn't really come to ICC prepared to go whitewater rafting so all I had were my cheap Wal-Mart flip-flops. I tried to MacGyver my way to be able to use them on the raft, but decided it was worth the rental fee to have my feet covered. For some reason, the shoe laces tied around the flip flop and up my ankle didn't seem as good an idea when water booties were right there to rent.

After a very entertaining orientation session given to us by a guy who reminded me of "Crush" from Finding Nemo...Heather, Jeff, Brian, Karen and I got all suited up with our helmets, PFD (Personal Flotation Device -- NOTE: they're not LIFEJACKETS) and our paddles and got into Kiwi's raft. Our rafting guide was Kiwi - a dairy farmer from New Zealand. I could barely hear him, but it sounded like he's a pretty young (22) guy whose pretty accomplished in the whole whitewater sporting world and an experienced guide. Which he did do a great job at making sure we had a good time during our 2 hour rafting experience.

This whitewater course is a man-made course that has Class II-IV rapids so we'd go through a section of it, paddle up to this conveyor belt and go back through attacking the rapids in a different way.

It was such a fun time!! As much as I didn't want to, I did end up in the water and actually went under the raft for a second. So thankful I paid attention to "Crush" when he said what to do when that happens. I actually remembered and did just what he said. I was never soo happy to see Heather or hear her voice as I was when my head popped up out of the water. She said I looked panicked. No doubt! It was scary for the second that I was under the raft, but once I came out from under there it wasn't that bad. I got pulled into the raft and just started laughing. Oh my :)

Kiwi brought us through the course for 9 trips and gave us lots of fun stuff to do each time.
Anyway, I loved it. If you're ever in this area, I would definitely recommend checking out this place. In addition to the Whitewater Rafting they also have climbing walls and Zip Cord Courses (I REALLY want to do that!!) ... and Kiwi was a good guide. At the very least it was fun listening to him talk :)

I didn't bring my camera so I'm hoping to get some photos from our trip off their site. Once I get it I'll post them up.

Afterwards we were of course STARVING, so we stopped at Carolina's Wings where I had ribs and wings. Yummy...

Oh... it was a GREAT night!!!

And... I still have homework to do, so that's all for now!

Something that continues to come up as a key "ingredient" in all the topics we're talking about in ICC is Spiritual Maturity / Vitality. As part of our lesson on Spiritual Vitality they want to equip us with various tools to be able to continue to grow in our relationships with the Lord. So, one of our assignments for ICC is to go on a personal retreat for at least 3 hours.

Often when I spend my "half-days" with the Lord I like to go away... be outside. In Orlando that was most often at Leu Gardens. (sigh). So, I really wanted to be able to find a place to go for this assignment. I was looking at state park sites online and read this description... "quiet woods, trickling streams, melodious birds." So, I decided to go ahead and take the hour or so drive up to Crowder's Mountain State Park and Heather was nice enough to come with me.

We took a look at the map of hiking trails and decided we wanted to basically just go a little bit ... find a spot ... spend our time with the Lord. We pretty much decided that we wouldn't survive the hike up to the top. While it's probably not that big a deal of a hike for most people...I mean really... I get tired walking to class!

So... we took the "Turnback Trail" marked "MODERATE" and made it to our destination -- the point where it intersects with the "STRENUOUS" "Pinnacle Trail."

I found a great spot right near the intersection along the "Pinnacle Trail." It was one of those spots where the huge rocks create great sitting areas surrounded by huge, beautiful trees. A nice cool breeze kept coming through, the sun was peeking out just a bit though the cloudy sky... it was the perfect place. It was a sweet time of just being surrounded by His creation, processing stuff, praising Him and being reminded of some hard truths. I loved it. I love spending time out in nature with the Lord. It really does help me to "tune in" to Him better. It was so quiet -- peaceful, calming... I loved it.

As I sat there people would pass through -- all ages! So, when it was time to move on, the question came... did we want to try to go on the "Pinnacle Trail" and make it to "the top?" I thought -- if the little kid I saw with the Bob the Builder backpack can make it up there... certainly we can!!! So, we decided to go for it.

Boy, I've never felt so out of shape! We had to stop every few minutes for "catch my breath," "stretch my legs," breaks. It was a good time. I enjoyed Heather's company and we had some good talks. And it really was beautiful -- even saw some colorful leaves!!! (I miss fall!!!) At one point we thought... can we really make it? So we asked some people headed back down... "Is it much further?" They replied, "It's not much further. You can make it. It's worth it." Ah.... encouragement. What a difference it makes. And as we kept climbing on we met others who said the same to us.

So we made it to the top. And it was worth it. It was beautiful up there.

We would have missed it if we just gave up and turned around. We would have missed it if we gave in to the thoughts that we were too tired... that we couldn't do it... that it was too far -- unattainable. We would have missed it if we didn't have the encouragement of each other and those we met along the way.

My time with the Lord was precious. And I loved the things He pointed out to me in His Word. He showed me truths in that time that I will continue to wrestle with and ask for true understanding. It was so wonderful to spend that time with Him. And as a bonus... in terms of gaining tools for Spiritual Vitality... thinking about it now, based on what I've been experiencing during ICC and this last week, I think some observations from our hike up was the greatest Spiritual Vitality "tool" I got from today and the thing God wants me to really know and experience.

Recognize need for not going the road alone. Recognize the value of perseverance. Recognize the importance of keeping the goal before me --- because I don't want to miss it. It's worth it.

OH!!! and this was funny... on the way back we would meet people who were asking us, "Is it much further." So, one couple sitting on a bench much like we were -- tired, resting, unsure if they wanted to keep going. So when they asked us, we replied in our cheery way... "It's not much further at all. You can make it. If we can make it you can. It's worth it." And the guy replies... "Yeah... we've already gone down the other trail and hiked up the other mountain." HA!! Didn't I feel like a slacker :) But I'm learning not to compare myself with others... so it didn't rob me of the joy of our hike!!! :)

And by the way... there were "quiet woods and melodious birds," but I couldn't find the "trickling streams."I guess they were victim to the drought here.

"...8 pack, value size with Sweet Tea, please. And I'd like honey roasted barbeque sauce... 4 packets, please."

My mouth was drooling as I said the words. It's only been a month, but oh... how I've missed it.

Oh, Chick Fil A ... I will miss you when I'm in the Philippines...










Oh... and how I love the sweet tea refills!!!!

Ok... in the midst of all the intense stuff of the last couple of weeks, there has been fun too!

Tuesday I took a "Land Transportation" course where we practiced off-road driving.

OH WHAT FUN IT WAS!!!

There was a group of 5 of us in the class. We drove out to the back woods on the center and drove through the woods basically. We were driving down these nice dirt paths with the trees and spider webs snapping as the car came through. I had A LOT of fun.

We drove through the wooded course and then came to a clearing where we drove the car up these cement "steps" and then had to be directed by another person to drive and park the car on top of two flattened soda cans. Oh -- while you're not able to see out the front windshield! It's supposed to help you to learn how to give / follow directions if you need to navigate someone through some road obstacles.

A couple of things I have to remember:

1 - slow down: ok, I have a tendency to drive a little on the fast side. As I was driving I was going up this one incline that had some pretty deep ruts that I was driving in and thinking I had to make it up that hill I gave it a little gas. Maybe a little too much since the instructor said I could slow down a little. Funny. That's the same thing my Driver's Ed teacher told me too! :)

2 - when you're driving and it looks like there's a nice little drop off... would be a good idea to get out and take a look at it before driving ahead: We got to this one spot where it looked like the dirt road just ended. The instructor said to go down that way. I took a peak out the window to make sure there was something down there... it looked okay, so I went. Thinking about it afterwards... I probably should have gotten OUT to check that.

3 - off-road driving was not intended for my cute little Nissan Altima: As much as I'd like to do that again, I don't think it would survive such a course!

It's been an intense couple of days. So much has been going on.
This week I have been gripped with feelings of...
FEAR.
INADEQUACY.
UNWORTHINESS.
CONFUSION.
HURT.
SADNESS.

But, I've seen God's glory.
I've seen Him shine through the lives of other people who have humbled themselves in ways that make me stand in awe. I've seen His glory through the HOPE that people have clung tightly to. I 've seen His glory through His children walking in the LIGHT and letting Him shine on the darkness. I've seen His glory as He's brought forth His Word to bring COMFORT, PEACE and TRUTH. I've seen His glory as I've heard the words of truth, encouragement and prayer lifted up by His children.

It amazes me. There IS victory in Jesus! When I let myself forget who He is... I forget that and am full of fear. When I am reminded of who He is... who I am in Him... then I can be confident to move forward.

Thank you to those of you who have been praying for me. It has and continues to make a difference. PRAY ON!!!

And let me know how I can pray for you. If there's one thing I'm learning... prayer for one another is CRITICAL!

Today we had the 2nd installment on SUFFERING.

It seems that when we talk about God's promises we talk about how God provides, how He keeps us safe, how He makes us happy. But when do we talk about SUFFERING as a part of God's plan and His promise?

I've read and heard stories of horrific torture that believers have gone through for their faith. And how they live through it with earnest, passionate conviction and love for their Savior. I have heard the stories of missionaries who have suffered heartache after heartache with the loss of children, spouses, destruction... and yet... there is in their hearts such LOVE, FAITH and TRUST.

In reading books and articles and hearing stories of the persecuted church I hear a similar sentiment among these "blessed ones." Often, we from the West will offer our sympathy and tears to our brothers and sisters in the persecuted church. Their response often reflects this heart... "Don't feel sorry for us. God has shown us His glory."

These sessions on suffering have raised these questions for me...

• Do I value God's glory more than my own comfort? rights? life? work?
• Do I value God's glory more than the comfort? rights? life? of my family and friends?
• Do I REALLY believe that suffering is a way that may be a part of God's plan and purpose to reveal His glory?
• Do I focus on my circumstances or on my Lord and WHO HE IS?
• Do I believe that God gives His grace when suffering comes?
• Do I believe that His grace is sufficient?
• Is my faith even that "strong" or "big" or "risky" to even warrant the need for suffering or persecution???
• How do I know when I'm "ready" to accept this reality of the life ahead of me?

I look around at my fellow trainees, I think about the people who I've met, I think about my brothers and sisters in Christ around the world and I wonder... what sufferings will come? to whom? how will we respond? How will God's glory be revealed among us?

There has been this dull, weak, weary feeling in my heart as I've been thinking about suffering since last week's session. Is that the right response?

In hearing the testimony of the saints who have suffered -- the ways they have better seen and come to know and love the Lord... the ways their faith has expanded... the ways others have come to know God through their suffering -- perhaps one day that feeling will be replaced with "joy"? At least today... I feel a greater sense of HOPE.

An excerpt from our session today:
"When we experience pain or loss, we often ask, 'Why?' We find ourselves desperately seeking purpose. Tell me there is meaning in this. Tell me this happened for a reason. As we look at our present circumstances and examine the past, and we can't see how anything good could come from the pain. This is because the purpose behind our pain is found not in the past or the present, but is His future glory."


"For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us." - Romans 8:18

"But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. To Him be dominion forever and ever. Amen." - 1 Peter 5:9-11

"But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have sufferend the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead." - Philippians 3: 7-11

If you think about it this week... PLEASE PRAY FOR ME!

Today, the church I normally go to here in NC was not having service (they're on a retreat). So... I ventured out and chose to go to a Korean church. It was such a cool experience. Ok... I don't like it when people say "All Filipino people..." but really... it seems like Koreans always have such BEAUTIFUL singing voices!! The service was all in Korean, so I didn't understand much. But, it was a beautiful reminder to me of the value of worshipping in one's own heart language as I heard them all sing, pray, worship in their language.

After service I was invited too to join them for lunch. It was YUMMMMYYY!!! During lunch a kind woman came up to me -- she leads the youth group -- and invited me to come back to share with their youth about my calling and about this ministry. Woo-hoo!!! I'm excited! This Friday from 8 pm - 9 pm I'll be sharing with both the youth group and the children in a combined meeting.

So... if you would... PLEASE PRAY!!
I didn't come to NC prepared to do any "formal" sharing. I didn't think I'd have the opportunity or time. So, I didn't even bring any of my presentation "stuff." Would you pray that I'd be disciplined about taking time this week to prepare and that God would give me great creativity and all the resources I'll need to communicate the message He wants shared with this group? -- THANKS!!

Okay... yeah, I know. I've been a blogger slacker. Last week I was having internet problems in my apartment and just lost the momentum. So... today is catch up day.

Tuesday 8.21.07
ICC: Day 13 - "Bumming Meals..."
Something fun about ICC is bumming meals off of the Pubols. (hehehehe) It seems like I've done it a lot since ICC started. Today's meal was unintentional. I came bearing Banana Flavored Reese's Peanut Butter Cups... and ended up getting Sloppy Joes and Salad :)
Yummmy... so good to having them around! They're so good to me :)


Wednesday 8.22.07
ICC: Day 14 - "Cookies and Coffee"
Had the Pubols and Karen over for dinner. We watched some Brian Regan on YouTube (FUNNY guy!) and then started the cookie taste test.
While we were at Wal-Mart I picked up a tube of Toll House cookie dough and Wal-Mart cookie dough. We had a taste test to see if there was a difference. Mike and Rachele came over and joined us for Cookies and Coffee and story time. :)
It was fun evening hearing all the cute "how we met stories" and hearing bits and pieces of where people have been and parts of their life stories. I think that's the thing I like about things like this (weeks long training) -- getting to meet and getting to know people and their stories. It's also the thing I have hard time with in things like this ... it's just a few weeks... and I know I'm only getting glimpses of their lives. But, every bit is worth while.

Thursday 8.23.07
ICC: Day 15 - "The Most Exhausting Day"
Today was undeniably the most exhausting day of all of ICC. We talked about Spiritual Warfare and then about Suffering. We heard the testimony of a couple (not with my same organization) who had to deal with much suffering and I heard the absolute PRAISE and FAITH with which they faced, and continue to face that suffering.

I can't even express yet the thoughts I had about that day. I came back from the class just mentally, emotionally exhausted. I journaled and cried for about an hour after I got back. I'll blog about it I'm sure... but if I tried to do it now, it would be wayy too long.

Friday 8.24.07
ICC: Day 16 - "I LOVE EPHESIANS!"
I absolutely love the book of Ephesians. This was one of the turning point books for me during college and God continues to use it to return my heart to His. In class we went through how to do an Inductive Bible study and used Ephesians as an exercise. Following that we had a woman come and share about "Identity in Christ." After the previous day's class and my "spiritual weariness" that followed... this was a great reminder.

Friday nights one of the families has continued their weekly tradition of family game night opening it up to all us ICC'ers. I played SEQUENCE for this first time and watched a game of Kansas City Rook (?). Now I know how to play ... next time... watch out!

Saturday 8.25.07
ICC: Day 17 - "Blah Blah Blah"
That's kind of how I felt today. Woke up. Put laundry away (yes... Friday I finally did laundry!). Changed my license plate. Went to the grocery store. Wrote some. Read some. Watched some online tv. ate too much. went to an ICC BBQ. Held a baby. Ate too much again. Came home. Watched more online tv while writing some more. Did some more reading. Blah-blah-blah.

So... that's the re-cap.

So this week we're focusing on some Interpersonal Skills topics.

We took a personality profile...

This is my "normal, unmasked, unguarded behavior" -

"C/I/S: Competent Influencing Specialist

C/I/S's like to do things right, impress others and stabilize situations. They are not aggressive or pushy people. They enjoy large and small crowds. They are good with people and prefer quality. They are sensitive to what others think about them and their work. They need to be more determined and dominant. They can do things well, but are poor at quick decision-making. They are capable of doing great things through people, but need to be more self-motivated and assertive. They are stimulated by sincere, enthusiastic approval and logical explanations."*

WOW! I think this is right on.

2 questions...

• For those of you who know me, do you agree?
• Can I just call myself a CSI??? :)

I LOOOOVVEEE this kind of stuff!!!

*Material comes from the Uniquely You Personality Profile - http://www.uniquelyyou.net/ or http://www.leadin.org/

... another year older :)

Usually on my birthday I am very reflective. I contemplate life and what I've gone through in the year and think about what I want to see happen in the next year. Today wasn't like that at all. I think it was because I was pretty busy all day with class, running errands and such. And you know what? I think I'm okay with that.
I think living here in Waxhaw has helped me to relax about things a little bit :)

It's been a blessed day.

• went to class and was sung happy birthday to... as much as I didn't want for people to know, it was really nice to "have a birthday"


• heard special birthday greetings from dear family and friends on voicemail


• talked to my sister and parents


• got to listen to my nephew -- my sweet, sweet nephew -- sing happy birthday to me on my voicemail


• had a fun birthday dinner at Marino's Pizza with some of the folks from ICC


• ate some YUMMY Philly Cheesesteak stromboli


• surprised by the Pubols with a Carvel Ice Cream!!!!!!


• learned some French :) ... no, I don't need to learn French to go to the Philippines. We had a practice session with a "Language Resource Person" (LRP) to try out a language learning technique.


• reminded that I am God's creation--I'm His... "You are worthy, O Lord our God, to receive glory and honor and power. For you created everything, and it is for your pleasure that they exist and were created." - Revelation 4:11

One bad thing from today...I woke up with a zit on my chin... isn't that supposed to stop at my age???!!! Okay...and another, I keep procrastinating working on my homework (hence my blogging right now! :)

My prayer, in a song sung at church today:

Potter's Hand - Darlene Zschech

Beautiful Lord, Wonderful Saviour
I know for sure,
all of my days are held in your hands,
crafted into your perfect plan

You gently call me into your presence
guiding me by Your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through Your eyes
I'm captured by Your holy calling
Set me apart, I know you're drawing me to yourself
Lead me Lord I pray

Take me, Mold me, use me, fill me
I give my life to the Potter's hand
Call me, guide me, lead me, walk beside me
I give my life to the Potter's hand

You gently call me into your presence
guiding me by Your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through Your eyes
I'm captured by Your holy calling
Set me apart, I know you're drawing me to yourself
Lead me Lord I pray

Take me, Mold me, use me, fill me
I give my life to the Potter's hand
Call me, guide me, lead me, walk beside me
I give my life to the Potter's hand

... access to the worldwide web is back!!!

Access to websites was messed up today. Granted, I was out for most of the day and had plenty to do without having to go on the web... but boy, it's nice to be able to get on again!!!

Since I couldn't get on ... it's not actually "DAY 9" anymore and it's late.
So I'll just say this about today...

• I had a great time this morning starting a study on God's names.
• I enjoyed a beautifully cool, breezy morning.
• Had a fun lunch with the women at ICC.
• Loved the yummy Mexican food - five dollar fajitas (okay $5.45, but still -- a deal!)
• I finished my homework for Monday and Tuesday!!
• Spent time with some fellow ICC'ers exploring downtown Matthews, NC (not that exciting...) and having some delicious Mango Gelato Water Ice (oh... exciting)!
• We watched a youth concert at FICC (Filipino International Community Church) that was fun.
• I actually said something in Tagalog to someone at the church (YES! I did it!!!)

I can't believe I have completed one of my four weeks here. The week has gone fast. And it has been GOOD.

I'm glad to be here and I think my time will go quickly. More quickly than I'll want.

Things I like about being in Waxhaw / ICC:

1. walking to class in the morning ... watching the sun rising over "Crystal Lake" while listening to "I Will Sing of My Redeemer," "Share the Well," or "All the Nations" (thanks, Ruth!)
2. people saying hello and really greeting each other and actually engaging in conversation!!
3. the sound of frogs? crickets? at night
4. the authenticity and transparency of the staff here
5. not having a TV (shock!) and mostly having quiet
6. having the chance to learn how to go "off roading" (in two weeks!!)
7. not having a lot of responsibilities (yes, I have a lot of homework and there are things I am working on personally... but it's different)
8. having my eyes opened and being constantly challenged
9. having my lunch hour outside
10. hearing people's stories

This weekend:

• Saturday Afternoon: "Gals outing" - lunch
• Saturday Evening: Youth concert at the Filipino church and exploring the area near the church
• Sunday Morning: church (probably followed by lunch)
• Sunday Evening: ice cream party for one of the ICC kids who's turning 6!!!
• Somewhere in the weekend: lots of homework, writing, laundry AND hopefully attending Northland's church service online :)

...and that name is "Wal-Mart" -- okay "Wal-Mart Supercenter" to be technically correct.

Tonight Heather, Jeff and I drove 15 miles away from Waxhaw, NC to ... South Carolina to go to the Wal-Mart Supercenter. I don't think I've ever been so happy to see a Wal-Mart before. Just the fact that there were lights and an actual shopping center was a big deal for me. But then... I saw ... the red and white awning and the big "C" --- ahhhhh... a Chic Fil A!!!!

Waxhaw isn't bad... it's a nice quiet place and I've been enjoying it. But it's just different for me to be so "removed" from stores and DRIVE THRUs :)

Heather and Jeff let me drive out there. Probably the last time they'll do that though. I'll just say dark roads, no lights, lots of curves... and me driving :)

It's too late for me to be starting a post tonight so this will be quick.

I had dinner with a Wycliffe couple tonight. Myself, 2 other ICC trainees and another gentleman with Wycliffe were invited over to their home. The one couple served in Peru for 26 years and the one gentleman was there for 36 years (I think I have those numbers right!) Regardless... both families served in Peru a whole lot of years!!

It was encouraging after being in class all morning hearing about learning how to really be engaged in another culture, and knowing how / when to make personal adjustments ... hearing the challenges and how emotionally, physically, spiritually challenging that can be...

It was encouraging to hear the stories of men and women who have done it over the long haul.

Without mistakes? No. Without hardships? Certainly not.
With God's grace? Yes. With His power and faithfulness at work? Certainly.

TIP FOR TODAY: Remember it is critcal to have complete submission, reliance and dependence on God. Recognize that you can't do it. And He knows it. His power is perfected in weakness.

And another...
Commit to become more over time than you are right now. Recognize that you are not complete. You can become more than you are right now. And He will.

I just got home from dinner with some incredibly generous-hearted people. Their ministry is "The Pauline House Inn" where they host those in ministry for short stays and for dinners -- providing a place for rest, relaxation and refreshment. We had a yummy dinner, nice conversation and a hymn sing. :)
The host husband used to travel in a singing group and treated us to a solo or two -- like those sweet oldies that you see in those movies. It reminded me of songs like ... "by the light of the silvery moon..." (is that even the right words?? I should have made that a request!) Anyway... it was a nice time. I'll have to blog another time about the couple and how they met. It was sweet.

Today in class we discussed CULTURE and WORLDVIEW. It was so eye-opening for me. Some things that seem so "DUH!" are the things that I think I will have the hardest time remembering and applying in my life in Manila.

There was A LOT that I got from the class today. Just one main take-away...

When learning and adjusting to another culture you have to be intentional and attentive. You have to communicate to people that you WANT to know about their culture. Be willing to have an exchange of thoughts and ideas. Show appreciation for the things they are teaching you. BE RECEPTIVE.

Ok, I know... you're saying -- "DUH, Aileen!" This was an important thing for me to hear.

I am FILIPINO. This is my heritage. It is my blood. BUT I have to recognize the fact that I was born and raised in AMERICA, by Filipino parents. I went through the American school system, lived and played and worked in America. I don't know everything about FILIPINO culture. In the same way I don't know everything about AMERICAN culture. Nobody does. BUT sometimes, I get so defensive among Filipinos ... feeling a need to prove my "Filipino-ness" that I don't necessarily communicate a desire to learn from them. I can have an attitude like, "Yes, of course I know that. I AM Filipino, you know!"

I won't do well in Manila (or in any other culture) if I have that attitude.

Lord, break down my pride. Help me to have a willingness to learn and desire to grow. Help me to have a true spirit of humility.

Following the main class there was a required class for married couples. It's open to singles -- so I went. I figure I'll be working with married couples -- it would be good to know the things that might be stress points, etc. It was fine (for those of you who are worried, it didn't make me sad and depressed that I'm single!). I'm really glad that I went. So many things in marriage relationships apply to relationships in general so it was very good. I'm thankful that in training before people go to their ministry assignments, there is a time for people to really consider the marriage relationship. There has to be a very real recognition of the vulnerabilities and the impact on marriage in missions.

Oh... funny moment. There was a time in class when the presenter said that the homework was to go home tonight and talk to your spouse about desires that became expectations in your marriage. And for those who don't have their spouses here and the singles -- to go home and talk to yourself :) hahahah!!!

This is how I spent my lunch hour... Reading my homework underneath a tree on a beautiful and sunny day.
It was lovely.

It was nice to go back to class this morning. We began to discuss and explore feelings of being in another culture. We did an interactive exercise today. Those usually make me cringe, but it was really good. We basically began exploring the ways we feel when we encounter cultures and practices other than our own and how we make assumptions based on our own perspectives and world view. From our exercise we could imagine that in a real life setting -- over time -- we might experience real feelings of frustration, exhaustion, disbelief, confusion, anger, uselessness, being set up for failure...

What would it be like to live that way? How would our ministries be if we were feeling those ways?

They shared 3 skills for being open...

• Suspend Judgment
• Tolerate Ambiguity
• Think Grey
  

Those three things are not always easy for me. I'm often quick to make judgment and assumptions. I like to know what's happening -- when -- why -- what for. I usually think pretty logically and in black and white. So...these were good points to discuss for me.

If the rest of ICC will be like today -- I'm really glad to be here. One of the things they said on the first day was that they wouldn't be giving us answers. It's more like we'll be bringing up the questions. ... and as much as I like people telling me the answers, I think that's good. I think there are a lot of things that I just haven't even thought about to think about. I think this will help me to consider things I wouldn't have otherwise.

Today was also about "being open" to what this place and this time will have for me. So... I'm looking forward to getting some physical activity. I walked to and from class today. I know... some of you are thinking -- what??!! Physical activity -- phbbt!! Well... I would walk a few yards from my house to the car... to the office ... to my desk and then sit for a whole day. At least here it's a little bit further than that!
AND... I'm looking forward to being outside. I sat outside today and made some phone calls (because it's the only way I can get cell phone reception!). It was nice. I love being outside. Looking forward to being out more :)

Ah... one other thing that I realized today...

I'm interested in the self-discovery process that'll likely be taking place now and when I'm in the Philippines. There are lots of influences in all of our lives. I think it's only been recently that I've become aware of how some things I do are "unique" when I'm the only Filipino around. I never realized it was "different."

So, what will I discover are the things in me that are due to my family? to my being Filipino? to my being American? to my being Filipino American? to my being a believer? to my being involved with Campus Crusade? to my being a Wycliffe person? to my being ME?

Open to seeing what there is to discover...

I'm here in Waxhaw for one month.
One whole month.
Without a TV.

There are some things I want to do while I'm here... (not in any particular order)

1. Start going through Basic Tagalog study books
2. Go through a devotional I've had on God's names - Lord, I Want to Know You (Kay Arthur)
3. Pick up guitar again
4. Start to exercise / eat well again!! -- REALLY!!!
5. Relax!
6. Get to know people here
7. Journal / write
8. Take lots of pictures
9. Laugh
10. Sit / play outside
11. Visit local sites (mountains? lakes? -- what's here??)
12. Communicate with friends and those on my ministry team
13. Try to connect with churches in the Dallas area for my visit in September
14. Work on a portfolio of materials to provide to churches
15. Read - I brought a bunch of books with me that I want to read ...

• Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister -- book by the same author as Wicked. This one is the Cinderella story from the stepsister's point of view
• The Heavenly Man -- almost done just a few more chapters left. This is the unbelievable testimony of a Chinese brother. Amazing book if you've not read it. It's taking me long because I can only read so much at a time. It's powerful.
• The History of Love -- don't know anything about this book. Just picked it up at Barnes and Nobles
• From Bondage to Bonding - a book about escaping codependency and embracing Biblical love
• A Room Called Remember - by Fredrick Buechner. I've not read anything by him before but everytime they quote him at church my heart resonates with what he says. I thought it was time I picked up something by him to read.

I think the number one thing on my list of things I want to do while I'm here is this... just be with the Lord. I want to just be in His presence. Hear Him. Sense Him. Be with Him. I feel like I've been running on auto-pilot lately. Things have been moving along and I've kind of just been going along with it all without even really realizing it. I want to be more present.

Tomorrow back to class. Good -- I'm ready :)

Happy Birthday tomorrow to my Daddy!!!

Today I went with a few other trainees to visit a Filipino church. Each of us will eventually be going to the Philippines and this is a chance for us to get familiar with the culture. It was such a welcoming group of people. I really enjoyed it and look forward to going back.

While I enjoyed the church, the fellowship and the opportunity to get to know a couple from ICC... I still missed going to my church back in Orlando. Thankfully I can still attend worship online since my church webstreams each service. So, I joined in on the 5:00 pm service tonight. The opening portion of the service was quite fitting for me.

As I read through my blogs, some might feel like I'm obsessed with Florida. I don't think I am. I think I'm just going through the process of letting go of this place I've come to call home. Similarly, my church is having the last of its services in the building they've been in for the last 20 something years (?). Next week the open the new building and will begin having the worship services there. At the start of the service Pastor Vernon was sharing how places can hold memories for each of us and how places can be significant to people as such. He shared how possibly the Mount of Olives might have been a special place to Jesus. He passed through there on his way to go to Mary and Martha when Lazarus was dead. He often went there to be alone with the Father. And on that "beautiful, scandelous night" He went there.

It made me think of places that have been like that to me. In Gainesville it was the botanical gardens by the lake, the Thomas Center, the Reitz Union gallery, the little nook by the tower that only I know about :) In Pennsylvania it was the BCCC gardens, Core Creek Park, Barnes and Nobles.

In Orlando it was Leu Gardens, Lake Eola Panera, early mornings (ha!) or after-hours at Wycliffe.

Places do hold significance to me and I think that's why it's hard whenever I have to go through a change of leaving a place. Pastor Vernon had such a good word for me.

He said... Places are only a part of our journey -- our pilgrimage; for He is preparing a place for us. The point of these places are for us to be where Jesus is...to follow after Him.

So... praying that I will be here in this place He has me now. And that I'd do the same here in Waxhaw as I have in other places-- be met by Him. And for that to be true in each place where I will follow Him.